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How We Treat Our Dogs
Difficult Doggies
Living with a difficult dog can be one of the most challenging experiences for the heart.
This is especially true of dogs with severe issues like aggression, anxiety or destructive habits.
Owning these dogs can be among the most transforming experiences in our lives. Every dog calls upon its owner in one way or another. I believe we get the dogs we do for a reason. For those of us with challenging dogs, a difficult dog can make us better people and certainly better owners. We can use it as an opportunity to learn or we can retreat in frustration, fear and confusion. We must be prepared for the possibility that for our dogs to change, we may need to be the element that changes first. Mahatma Gandhi once wrote that you can tell a lot about a nation by the way they treat their animals - How we treat our dogs can tell us a lot about ourselves.
How did we get here from there?
On a hunting trip, a friend of my fathers was shocked to find that his favorite dog had turned on him. He was in such fear that he fired a shot in the direction of the charging dog to warn him off. He loved his dog and repeatedly claimed he never saw it coming. Though his friends had great sympathy for him, they confided in me that they were confident the dog had given their friend plenty of warnings had he only been paying attention.
I grew up with the philosophy that dogs have their own rationale and language. While it may be that certain dogs, because of flaws in their breeding or illness may be capable of "snapping"; it is unlikely for the majority of dogs. Dogs that are out of balance will begin to exhibit gradually escalating behaviors. There will be small signs along the way. An aggressive dog will show himself by his posture and approach. A fearful dog will do all he can to avoid the situation or you before striking and some never will, but the point is. if you learn to read the signs. dogs will always let you know what they are thinking.
They are always communicating and in the same way. they are reading us in ways that are subtler than we can know. They read our energy, our state of mind, our subtlest movements. Many dogs will try to react in anticipation of our requests and actions.
Sometimes problems arise because of a simple lack of information. Sometimes though, they arise over time through inconsistency and a lack of clear boundaries. When we first get our puppy, we naturally want to nurture and protect it. Most of us cannot help but indulge our pups and sometimes, our role as leader to our young charge is lost. They grow up as our friend and loving companion. About the time a pup reaches adolescence, it will begin testing limits in earnest. This can create a bumpy time for owner and companion while a confusion of roles gets sorted out.
When we rescue a dog we have similar impulses to nurture and protect. There is an important bonding period during which trust and love are cultivated as owner and dog get to know one another.
These are important early phases in our relationships, yet it is also important that while we give love and build trust we do so from a position of leadership or "alpha".
Read more about Alpha >>
